Balancing Sales and Helping the Buyer Buy

Today I was interviewing a 30-year sales veteran and he told me that had he tried to help the buyer be more successful with the buyers project rather than trying to "sell his solution", he would have gotten both a sale and he would have helped the buyer simultaneously. And he might not be looking for a job today.

What?

We have all heard stories of how we manipulate the questioning techniques we've read in books to get at the problems and implications and the pain etc. etc. etc.; do you realy think the buyers are not "on to you" with that approach?

Instead, go in realizing that the buyer wants and needs your help to make the buyers project as successful as possible (with or without you). In so doing, you wll be rewarded. That means helping the buyer align priorities with the three categories of stakeholder, (bet you didn't know that the buyer is really three distictly different buyers in a high dollar matrix-buying sale), understand requirements and establish success criteria. Tell me your experience when you've done this effectively for the buyer.